How do I deal with my rising sexual tension before marriage?

Question: Hello Jeffrey, First of all, thank you for all the work and efforts you have put into the site, Growing Up in the Lord for Boys. Even though I’m in my mid to late 20s, I really appreciate the answers that you give, and how you give your answers a God-focused perspective, while also…

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Can taking Holy Communion miraculously heal?

Question: Dear friend, I was baptized as an adult who believes in Christ. I was told that he is our Perfector and our Savior. I had previously struggled with lust, hoping to rid my life of pornographic images. After the baptism, I would still sometimes masturbate, which a Christian friend said he once had problems with.…

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How can I stay out of fornication?

Question: Evening sir, I need spiritual deliverance. I am a married man, but before my marriage, I was lost in fornication. I even dragged my fiancee into it. We realized later that it was not good and confess our sins. However, I couldn’t get control over my sexual desire, to the extent that I masturbated…

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Does “burning with passion” include masturbation?

Question: Hello preacher, I write to you because I want to read your answer more carefully and I believe that a written response will be more crafted. I’ve already read the material you have on the website about masturbation while one still a single person and the subject was closed to me for. Recently, however,…

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Is masturbating a lack of self-control?

Question: I found some of your insights on the subject of masturbation quite amazing. As an evangelical, we are taught to develop spiritual disciplines of which self-control is one. In fact, in Galatians 5:22 the apostle Paul highlights it as one of the fruits of the Spirit. To this effect, it is argued that, if…

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I’ve been going through a lot and I’ve just had it with life

Question: I need help. I’ve been going through a lot right now. But here is what is going on: We couldn’t afford to stay at my original house, so we had to move into a smaller house. Money is really tight right now. We’re poor. I don’t know if God is doing it to us.…

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My wife is no longer able to have sex. What is a Christian man to do?

Question: I appreciate the views you’ve expressed and have had questions about masturbation for a long time. My wife and I are in our seventies. For many years we had a good sexual relationship, except I wanted it a lot more often than she did. But sex was good and I recall often the special…

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Doesn’t I Corinthians 6:13 prove that masturbation is wrong?

Question: How can you teach that masturbation is good for controlling the body when it clearly says in I Corinthians 6:13, “You say ‘Food for the stomach and the stomach for food, and God will destroy them both.’ The body, however, is not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for…

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Is masturbation wrong because it is pleasurable?

Question: Mr. Hamilton, A Christian friend of mine brought to my attention concerning masturbation, that since the purpose and context for which God created sex to be used is between a married man and woman, (at least as far as the Bible speaks of) that masturbation is in opposition to God’s design for sex and…

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How can one know if he is a reprobate?

Question: I was wondering how one would know they are reprobate? I turned to a life of homosexuality for nearly ten years, but recently had a couple of nightmares that scared me into coming back to God. During the time in which I lived in that lifestyle, I attempted to convince myself with Scripture that…

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My wife has refused to have sex with me for years and I’m weakening

Question: Hello, I feel very ashamed to even write this, but I’ve been doing Google searches and scouring the Internet for answers. I would normally just ask a pastor from church, but I have a learning disorder or mental disability and everyone just writes me off as strange or stupid. Even pastors don’t want to take the time to…

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I’ve been struggling with being sexually pure

Question: I am a 27-year-old Christian virgin male who wants to wait for marriage for sex. I have struggled with maintaining sexual purity, however. I have struggled and been addicted to porn off and on since I was maybe 12 years old. I remember the first time I ever masturbated to completion, I felt so…

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Am I going to hell?

Question: Hello there, My questions are a little silly but I want to ask you: How bad am I in Jesus’ eyes? Considering the short summary, am I going to hell? I’ll tell you about myself so you can understand the questions. I am 18 years old non-Christian boy who lives a normal life with…

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I saw my son masturbating. How do I talk to him about it?

Question: Hello, I’m a nearly 40-year-old father of a teenage boy. I walked in at night to check on him, and he was masturbating. I watched until he ejaculated. He wasn’t using porn. I quietly exited, and I’m positive he doesn’t know I saw him. I do not know what to say to him. When…

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I’m having trouble not doing things I am unsure about

Question: I am having trouble not doing things that I am unsure about whether or not they are sinful, such as drinking soda, eating sweets, masturbation, and whether or not I should be playing certain card and video games. On the soda and sweets, I am wondering if I am harming my body by doing…

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How do I be free from sexual sins?

Question: How do I be free from sexual sins? First, I thank God that I came across this website as I was browsing on the Internet. This site really gives me so much to learn. Well, straight to the main problem. I don’t know whether I’m a porn addict or not, but based on my…

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I have a hard time stopping something I’m addicted to doing

Question: Hi there. I have an addiction to something I’d rather not say. (It’s not drugs ) haha. But it’s something I want to stop, but it’s so hard. I made a promise to God saying I will not do this addiction for one week. On the third day, I did it. I have broken…

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I recently caught my son masturbating. What advice can I give him?

Question: Hello, I recently caught my son masturbating. I wasn’t aware that he had begun to do something like that. I talked with him about it, and he does feel it’s wrong to do it. He feels he is doing it too much and has difficulty resisting it. He has also looked at pornographic material…

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Is masturbating okay if you are thinking about your husband only?

Question: Is masturbating okay if you are thinking about your husband only? Answer: I think he would enjoy it more if you shared sex with him. Question: True, but what if he is not available? Does the Bible speak against it? Answer: No. There is nothing stated against it in the Scriptures, so long as it is not…

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How do I battle my foot fetish?

Question: I hope I am talking to the right guy about this. I read a story of a guy who struggles with a foot fetish. I have the same problem. I am a born-again Christian who loves God and His law. I also have had an interest in female feet since I was 5 years old…

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I was born with a foot fetish. Is that a sin?

Question: Hi, I am a believer and I read all that you wrote about the subject masturbation. I am glad that your answers are right and correct and according to the Holy Bible, but I have this problem and I could use some help because I don’t know what to think anymore. Here is the thing:…

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Can someone there talk to my son?

Question: I am a single mom with a 14-year-old son who is starting to become curious about sex. I caught him masturbating, which was awkward for both of us, to say the least.  I decided this was a perfect opportunity to have “the talk” with him, but he doesn’t want to talk with mom about…

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How do I stop my masturbating to gay pornography?

Question: Good morning sir. I’m 21 years old. I’m a leader in my church. I’ve always loved God and desire to know him and walk with him as Enoch did. But I have lusted. I started masturbating some years ago and have promised God not to anymore, but I can’t find the strength to stop…

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How do I explain spontaneous erections and masturbation to my stepson?

Question: During some research, I found on your site, which was named “Growing up in the Lord: A Study for Teenage Boys.” My stepson is beginning a new stage in life, puberty, and he has been getting spontaneous erections. Now, I realize that this can happen at any time and also any place. He’s been…

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I have a problem with controlling and avoiding masturbation

Question: How are you today? I am e-mailing you because I have a confession to make as well as an act of sin I like to address. So please bear with me. I am trying to live my life God’s way after many years of shunning Him. But I want to confess that I have a…

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Do the laws of uncleanness mean masturbation is sinful?

Question: I have to start by saying this: I do not fall under the law, but I try my best to obey it as the Holy Spirit guides me, or, as I allow God to use me. I am also not trying to make you feel guilt or shame, for it is not my duty…

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Which is better: to visit a prostitute or masturbate?

Question: Is it true that it’s better to have sexual relations with a whore than it is to masturbate? Some people refer to it as, “better in a whore than on the floor.” As a kid, I was taught that it would be better for me to masturbate than to have sex with a girl…

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