I think I might have read something inappropriate in church
Question:
Back a few months ago, I think I read something sexual while in church, maybe a fanfic? I don't really quite remember. I don't know if I continued reading it or not. The memory has been completely wiped off my head. I don't know if I read it at church or if I even read it. Maybe I read it before the mass started? I genuinely do not remember! I've prayed to God, but I feel like it isn't enough. It's making me feel guilty, but I'm not even sure if I did it. What do I do?
Answer:
"Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 3:13-14).
You are expressing classic signs of OCD. You are wrapped up in condemning yourself about an event that you can't even say with certainty occurred. There are no details. There is not nothing to pinpoint what exactly happened, where, or when. At the rate you are going, you'll start making up details and fixate on them for so long that they will become real to you. Christianity is about truth, not about what you imagine might have happened.
I would suggest that you dismiss the whole thing as a figment of your imagination, but I suspect that you'll find that difficult to do.
By the way, the Bible doesn't speak of "mass." That is a Roman Catholic thing that they created. God's word is truth (John 17:17), stick with it.
