I have been suicidal for years. I have so many problems and I don't like who I am.


I have been suicidal for years, and nothing seems to get better. Most people went through what I have gone through and are doing a little better. I feel like some are bless and some aren't. That's life! I love Jesus and wish I was good enough for him. I know no one is perfect, but I just don't like who I am. Yes, I'm a virgin and pray continuously. Things are worse! I'm now in my twenties. I know young people living their lives at my age and are happy. Some people my age are suffering like me or worse. I have to sacrifice for two children who are not mine because my sister is evil. No help at all! It's so much! My mom wants to move this month so she can work and have a better life for the children. This messing up my school, but I feel if I move things are still going to remain the same. I'm tired of moving and really everything. I'm only writing brief things, but my life problems are deeper than what you can even imagine. To tell you the truth, I don't know where I'm going to be.


"Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:11-13).

Happiness isn't about what happens to you, it is your attitude toward life. Good and bad things are always happening. You can focus on the bad and be miserable -- there is enough bad out there to make anyone sad. But a far more realistic view is to realize there is good in the world along with the bad. While you life isn't close to perfect or ideal, there are things to be thankful about.

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:6-7).

Sometimes we let prayers become nothing but gripe sessions to God, but that isn't good for us because it means we are not looking at life accurately. Making sure that we include the things that we are truly thankful for in our prayers causes us to remember that life does have its good points.

The reason some people do better than others is because they eventually learn this lesson.

Instead of getting trapped in the spiral of seeing only miserable things, Paul tells us to purposely set out to focus on the good things. "Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy -- meditate on these things" (Philippians 4:8). At first it is difficult. It may be hard to find those things even when you know they must exist. But with practice it becomes easier and over time it can become second nature.