My husband claims he been seeing other women where sexual touching was involved but no intercourse. He thinks it is no big deal. Do I have grounds for a divorce?


I recently found some inappropriate emails to my husband (of 15 years) from another woman.  He admitted to me that he has been with four other women starting about 5 years ago.  He says there was no intercourse only sexual touching.  He touched their genitals and they touched his leading to arousal but no intercourse.  He has been with one of the women over a dozen times and with the other three woman several times each.  He claims since there was no intercourse it's really "no big deal" and I would not have spiritual grounds for a divorce.  I would like to know your thoughts.


The most disturbing thought is that your husband thinks fooling around with four other women is "no big deal" solely because intercourse hasn't taken place. Such a person doesn't understand the seriousness of sin and doesn't believe he has sinned. Regardless of what you decide to do about your marriage, his soul is in jeopardy. Given such an expressed attitude, I see no way to trust his statements about what has gone on.

I would strongly urge that he gets counseling immediately. Whether you divorce him is your decision, it isn't one I can make for you. Nor can I tell you with so little to go on whether fornication has taken place, that too is something you'll have to make up your mind about.