Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD

Proverbs 18:22

by Sally Anne Perz

Next to God, the most important person in a wife’s life is her husband. Often wives are guilty of holding their husbands to their own expectations and standards or comparing them to other men. Learn what kind of a man you are married to—and remember that you were created to be HIS help meet. Be content with him! Discontent is the main ingredient in an unhappy marriage.

Knowing our own husband’s hobbies, likes, dislikes, personality traits, strengths and weaknesses will help us to love him in a way that pleases him—and ultimately pleases God. Consider some of these practical ways a wife can love her husband and pave the way for a ‘Song of Solomon’ kind of love in your relationship.

Be a loyal wife to your husband. Do not speak ill of him or ridicule him for any reason. A wise wife builds her husband up rather than tearing him down. Be discreet. A wife who is ill-mannered, course, vulgar and whiny brings shame upon her husband (and herself!).

Have a clear understanding of what your husband is able to contribute in the home—particularly when it comes to duties typically taken care of by a wife. Understand that his job is primarily to provide financially and to be the spiritual leader of the home. Let him determine his level of involvement in your realm. Do not try to make him do more—he will not morph into a more helpful man as a result of your nagging, but he will certainly morph into a more annoyed man!

Let your husband know how much you love and appreciate him daily, not only by your words, but by your actions. Be a happy, loving mother to your children. Do not undermine his authority with the children. Unified parenting is critical and your support will firmly establish this in your family.

Fulfill all of your husband’s needs all of the time as best as you are able!! Treat him like a king and your King will bless you. Provide healthy meals, clean clothing, a listening ear, a helpful hand, and most of all, freely give of yourself fully when it comes to your intimate relationship. Desire him and be desirable for him.

Keep within your budget so that you do not cause stress upon him as the sole provider. Plan well enough in advance so that he is aware of what funds are needed for any special purchases that may not be included in the budget. If you are in charge of the budget, be a good steward so that he can trust in you to make the best decisions possible.

Do the best you can to be a good homemaker and to provide a clean, organized and comfortable home. Do not expect your husband to keep the home for you. This is your job. If he lends a hand, be thankful, but don’t expect him to do fulfill your role as homemaker.

There is much written in God’s word specifically to wives. Set aside time to study and search for these scriptures. They’ve purposely been left out to encourage you to seek them on your own. Start with Proverbs—how many times are contentious wives mentioned? What wisdom is written specifically for wives? When you search and dig in God’s word yourself, you will find pearls of great price and make them your own. Dig deep!