Question:

Greetings for the day!

My best friend is not a believer, but he wanted to marry me. He was good and had no wrong relationships, but he watches porn often. He thought I was good too. But when he came to know about my previous wrong relationship, he was broken. I have repented now, but he's starting to go in the wrong direction. He thinks there is no use in being pure before marriage and is saying that he wants to enjoy sex like I did in my wrong relationship. He says that he's not sure whether his wife will be pure, so there's no point in him being pure. My past sins have made him think that nobody is trustable and all are bad. I feel like my past sins have misled him.

What should I do to make my friend normal and make him receive salvation? Thank you.


Answer:

First, no one can make your friend receive salvation. He has to choose the salvation that is offered to him by the Lord. "So then, my beloved, just as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your salvation with fear and trembling" (Philippians 2:12). What you can do is encourage him to learn the gospel that will lead him to salvation. "For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek" (Romans 1:16).

What you can do is point out that you regret the fact that you did not wait until marriage to have sex. You know you lost something special because of your sin, and you don't want him to be filled with the same regrets. Besides two wrongs never make something right. You cannot get something good out of doing wrong. "And why not say (as we are slanderously reported and as some claim that we say), "Let us do evil that good may come"? Their condemnation is just" (Romans 3:8).

What is driving him at the moment is jealousy, but he is being prideful as well. Marriage is not about what you get, but what you give to the relationship.