Can I not marry the woman my brother had sex with in the past?


Bless you sir,

I must confess you are doing a great job here. I have a pressing need and I'm disturbed. Is marring a lady your brother once had sex with in the past incest?

There is a lady I've been dating for sometime now. My brother broke the ugly news that I can't marry her because he once had sex with her. Because of that he involved my parents, pastors, and church members and all of them said it's not possible. Though I discovered I've missed living with her even without getting married; yet, I'm ready to start a new life. However, the pastors advised that I should forget her or ask for forgiveness and ask God if she is my real wife to be. Their reason is that it's a taboo. There is nothing to go on with because of her past. But she is good tor me regardless of her past. The church also said they can't conduct a marriage where the parents are not in support of the marriage. What do I do sir?


I teach the Bible and not the traditions of men. There is no passage that says a man cannot marry someone with whom his brother had sex. Under the Old Law, Israelites men were required to marry their brother's wife if he died without offspring (Genesis 38:6-11).

If you want to marry this woman, then I'm sure you can find someone to marry you. At the least you can get married at the government courthouse.

What I see instead is that both your brother and you have violated God's law against having sex before marriage. "Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge" (Hebrews 13:4). That is where the church should have focused its efforts and not in keeping two people from doing what they should have done first.