Question:

I'm a Christian and God-fearing women. I accept Jesus Christ as my Savior, and believe in His death and resurrection for the remission of our sins. My problem is that I prefer women. I know this is wrong. I have also fallen in love with another women. I've never been intimate with her. I've never been intimate with a man either. I'm really confused and conflicted about relationships and sex. I love God, but I have feelings for women. Does that mean I'm hell bound and not saved?


Answer:

Believing in Jesus is just a portion of what God requires of people to become Christians. See: What Saves a Person?

For example, Jesus asked a question that is pertinent to this discussion: "But why do you call Me 'Lord, Lord,' and do not do the things which I say?" (Luke 6:46). Personal feelings and desires do not enter into a discussion of what is right or wrong. Morality is defined by God and not man. Yet people often think that if they do things claiming the authority of God that somehow everything they do is accepted. "Not everyone who says to Me, 'Lord, Lord,' shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. Many will say to Me in that day, 'Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?' And then I will declare to them, 'I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!'" (Matthew 7:21-23).

Thus, when we discuss things, like sexual relationships, what you personally find attractive or desirable is only a secondary consideration at best. "For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due" (Romans 1:26-27). Sex with someone of the same gender is morally wrong. Like it or not, it is contrary to how God made mankind. This isn't up for negotiation.

Elements who wish to push the acceptance of sin have tried to redefine terms to make what is sinful appear right and what is right to appear sinful. For example, people avoid talking about having sex with someone of the same gender as proof that it should be accepted; instead, they talk about loving the other person, as if "love" is justification for sex. Yet, I can love my parents, my siblings, my friends, my home, or my job and sex has nothing to do with these relationships. While it is good to have friends of the same gender and to love them deeply in the true sense of the word, people today are told that such feelings and relationship are homosexual even though sex is not a part of the relationship. This murky mixing of terms causes people to doubt God's truth and doubt their role in life.

If you don't find a man you are interested in marrying and decide you would rather remain single the rest of your life, that is fine. If you have several women who are good friends with and you love them dearly, that is fine. But the moment that you take a relationship with another woman into the sexual realm, then that is wrong.

Thank you.