I don't even know where to start. (Deep breath) Well, I have been going to church for five years. I met this guy who isn't Christian, and we been together two years. We have been having sex all this time. Every time I feel worse. I ask God to forgive me all the time.
I guess my question is: Does God keep forgiving me? I want to stop, but I don't know what takes over me. I just need help. I don't want to live like this anymore. I feel so horrible. I'm sad. I'm depressed. I feel like I'm dishonouring the Lord because He's been so good to me, and I'm so unfaithful to him.
Please help me. I don't know what else to do. I feel so embarrassed and ashamed.
"For the sorrow that is according to the will of God produces a repentance without regret, leading to salvation, but the sorrow of the world produces death. For behold what earnestness this very thing, this godly sorrow, has produced in you: what vindication of yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what avenging of wrong! In everything you demonstrated yourselves to be innocent in the matter" (II Corinthians 7:10-11).
There are two ways to be sorry. One is were you regret what you've done, but you make no changes. This is worldly sorrow. There is no change in behavior and there is no change in attitude regarding the acceptability of the sin. Sometimes, only one or the other changes, but not both. Godly sorrow provides the motivation to change both your attitude and your behavior.
You know you are doing wrong and that your boyfriend is encouraging you to sin; yet, you haven't dumped the bum. "Do not be deceived: "Bad company corrupts good morals"" (I Corinthians 15:33). Repentance often requires a radical change in you life because you are convinced that sin has no place in the life a person striving to please God.