If I marry the man I'm living with, I'll lose half my benefits


I married at 15 to get away from an abusive father. That husband had an affair with our friend. I forgave him and took him back. He did it again. I divorced him for adultery.

I later married an older man who was divorced, who committed adultery many times. I finally divorced him.

Fifteen years later I met a man, had a church wedding and all of the glitter. After two years I found out he was still married and that meant I wasn't married to him.

I raised my children, raised grandchildren with autism and took care of mom until she died. It was over thirty years between the man I thought I married and the time mom died. I was single the whole time. After mom died, I almost did to. In a dream my mom told me to get on with my life.

Later I met this wonderful man who had been married to one woman till she died . Now we are living together and I believe it's sin. I'm 60 and he's 55, but he says God brought us together, and He blessed our union. If we marry we will lose over half our benefits and cannot live on what's left. If I continue living with him, am I going to hell, am I going anyway because of fornication, or is there a way to marry in God's eyes and not lose our benifits? I really was lonely or would have never slept with him, but if I'm going to hell anyway then I have nothing to lose except heaven. Tell me what I need to do.


"Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge" (Hebrews 13:4).

"Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; Who put darkness for light, and light for darkness; Who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!" (Isaiah 5:20).

I'm not impressed by a man who claims God approves of what God has stated is evil. I'm not impressed by a couple who values money over righteousness. "Better is a little with righteousness, than vast revenues without justice" (Proverbs 16:8). Nor is it impressive for a person to contemplate lying to the government.

The simple answer is to stop sinning. Either marry this man or move out, but sinning is never an option.