Question:

When I was 35 years old I was introduced to this church where the pastor is also a prophet. He is married and we called him daddy and his wife mommy. I was going through a lot at that time and I was helped through that man of God to find peace again in the midst of my challenges.

It started after seven months being a member of the church when everything was going well in my life. He approached me and told me "God told him I'm his wife." I was so disturbed and couldn't understand how it could be because he had a wife already. Then he said that he heard that first time I walked into his house but prayed about it making sure if he really heard God or if it was lust. I told him I am leaving the church, but then he begged me not to and asked me to pray about it. I told one of my sisters in the Lord, and we prayed about it.

He started to confide in me why does he believed God spoke. He said the wife does not allow him to do God's work. She told him to look for another wife who will cope with the ministry lifestyle because she just wants him alone. She does not want to share him with other people. Sometimes he goes away for revivals and when he comes back she's angry.

Therefore, God wanted to do a new thing so that he will flow in his calling. I am the woman who will support him. He said God knows I have the understanding and will cope. But he also said God will make ways. We should not do anything for the wife to leave because she will leave as she is not where she should be.

I eventually agreed to what he said, but told him we should keep our distance since he is still married. I told him my reasons why and he thought it was a good idea, but the evil one will divide us for good if we keep distant. He started to insist on seeing me most of the time, which at first I told him not to and he would not stop.

We became close and we had sex. I now have a baby boy who he now hates so much that he does not come to see him because when I was seven months pregnant I was diagnosed with the HIV virus. He believes it's me who brought the sickness into his marriage. He claims I knew that I was sick but wanted to be spiteful to him.

I still love him. I am not sure if it soul ties or what, regardless of the bad treatment. They are now separated. His wife and everyone blames me entirely for what happen, and I am left with the baby to support.

Please help me in this. I prayed and asked for forgiveness from God. I know He forgave me, but I am battling to have peace and forget about this man.


Answer:

"But false prophets also arose among the people, just as there will also be false teachers among you, who will secretly introduce destructive heresies, even denying the Master who bought them, bringing swift destruction upon themselves. Many will follow their sensuality, and because of them the way of the truth will be maligned; and in their greed they will exploit you with false words; their judgment from long ago is not idle, and their destruction is not asleep. ... But these, like unreasoning animals, born as creatures of instinct to be captured and killed, reviling where they have no knowledge, will in the destruction of those creatures also be destroyed, suffering wrong as the wages of doing wrong. They count it a pleasure to revel in the daytime. They are stains and blemishes, reveling in their deceptions, as they carouse with you, having eyes full of adultery that never cease from sin, enticing unstable souls, having a heart trained in greed, accursed children; forsaking the right way, they have gone astray, having followed the way of Balaam, the son of Beor, who loved the wages of unrighteousness ... For speaking out arrogant words of vanity they entice by fleshly desires, by sensuality, those who barely escape from the ones who live in error, promising them freedom while they themselves are slaves of corruption; for by what a man is overcome, by this he is enslaved" (II Peter 2:1-3, 12-15, 18-19).

Even though Paul stated that prophecy would end (I Corinthians 13:8-10), people cling to a wish that they can be given power that others do not have. Still, you should have known from the moment that he claimed that he was to marry a woman when he was married that you were dealing with a false prophet. He contradicted what God taught and God never contradicts Himself. Nor does God ever advocate sin. "This is the message which we have heard from Him and declare to you, that God is light and in Him is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with Him, and walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth" (I John 1:5-6).

I'm assuming that you haven't had sex with other men, or at least didn't have HIV before he started having sex with you, so we can assume that he gave HIV to you. That means he has been having sex with multiple women over the years -- probably giving each woman a similar line.

Why you choose to love an evil adulterous man, I cannot fathom. Love isn't the feeling. Love is a choice (I Corinthians 13:4-8). There are feelings that result from that choice, but choice comes first, not the feelings. Feelings are deceptive (Proverbs 28:26).

Yes, you are responsible for not heeding God's commands, but that doesn't release this man from his sins. I'm sorry that the consequences that resulted from your sins are so severe, but it is because promiscuous sex can lead to such dangers as you face that God warned us not to get involved in them. "Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding; he who does so destroys his own soul. Wounds and dishonor he will get, and his reproach will not be wiped away" (Proverbs 6:32-33).

There is no choice, if you want to follow Christ, but to leave this man, which includes finding a church that teaches the truth.

Thank you, man of God.