Question:

I do a lot of theatre in my area and a few months ago I did a show. During this show, I met a girl. She and I had to wait with each other for our cues in the same hallway during one song, so we talked a little there during rehearsals. On opening night, the entire cast went to a restaurant after the show. I ended up sitting with her, and we had a very enjoyable conversation.

Throughout the next three weeks of performances, she and I began talking backstage as well as in the hallway. After the show was over we joined a travelling troupe together, and our friendship grew. On one of the last nights of the travelling troupe performances, we went to the restaurant again. This time it went twice as well as the first time. She gave me her phone number and we have been texting ever since.

I have developed feelings for girl, and she has shown several signs of interest in me. I literally think about her at least four times every hour. She is nice, funny, caring, interesting, quirky, smart, kind, beautiful, and she can sing like a powerful angel. But I do not know if she is Christian. I doubt that she is because her parents are divorced and she goes to a public school.

I just need to know what the next logical step is. I know for a fact that if she isn't a Christian, my feelings for her will not immediately "turn off". I will still want to be with her all the time and talk to her about everything forever. I am going to a rehearsal with her soon, a performance and after-party with her later, and then diner and a movie with her and some friends next weekend. Do I confess my feelings to her? Do I ask her if she is a Christian? If I ask her either of those things, how should I go about it? If she is not a Christian, what do I do?

Please help me.


Answer:

You definitely are infatuated with girl. What is needed now is for both of you to get to know each other better.

There is nothing wrong with saying, "I find you very interesting to be around. Could we get together more often and not just when we are in theatre together?"

Among the topics you ought to discuss is each other's religion. So asking her where she goes to church can get the conversation rolling. Where you go with that conversation will depend on how she responds. Even if she isn't a Christian, it doesn't mean she won't be interested in becoming a Christian. I know a man who wanted a Christian wife but met a woman of a different religion. He began studying with her for the next two years and in the end she decided to be a Christian. They are now engaged to be married. But if the girl you are interested has no interests in Christianity, that is something you need to consider now before you get so involved that you are tempted to compromise your beliefs just to be with this girl.

The reason you haven't brought up the topic of religion is that you fear what you might find out. But it is the subjects that are critical which need to be discussed early on so a wise decision can be made.

Thanks for the wisdom! I don't know if you remember, but this is the second time you've helped me out. The first time changed my life, so I will definitely use this advice as well. Thank you for what you do. You are a real blessing.