Question:

My question is that my husband is an alcoholic, to point of now he has cirrhosis of liver and hepatitis C. He is in the end stages of his liver hardening. I have put my trust in Jesus the Father, for which I am grateful. He has been there for me more times than I can count with Him. I also have a suspicion that my husband does not truly believe in the Jesus.

I have read about how we are to be submissive to our husband's and I do try (but I am human) and sometimes he forces me to be the one to lead the family. He is unattached. I have made it or rather the Lord has made it to where he is on disability because he can no longer work, so I am the primary provider for the family. He does nothing but continues to drink every day (which is killing him quicker). He says that he has lived his life and is ready to go.

The other problem is how he alienated everyone in our family around him, even our daughter is now taking the brunt of his anger. He calls her names like you are retarded, you are so stupid, lazy, even some of the names I will not put in this email. I try to get on to him, that he shouldn't speak to her like that. He tells me to shut up; he will do whatever he pleases.

Now I do love him and I do understand that he had a rough life, He spent 16 years just in prison for different things. He does not do drugs, but he will not give up the drinking. God has been talking to Him for a long time (at least that is the way I put it to him). "If you don't listen to what God is trying to tell you He will try another way and if you still don't listen He will leave you alone, and then you will know it." The first sign was several years ago when he got put in jail for DWI. He was never convicted of it and somehow it just dropped off his record (tell me that is not the Spirit working), then he gets another one and his employer pays for a lawyer to take care of that case, without even asking for it back. He straightened up partially, then he went back to drinking. Then one morning he was throwing up blood. I rushed him to the Emergency Room. They put him in the hospital and then came out to tell me that he had cirrhosis of the liver and his liver was already hardening. He has been in and out of the hospital 3 or 4 times. Each time me begging him to go to Emergency Room because he wasn't doing well. I finally gave it all to the Lord, even though the human part of me wants to help and make it easier for the Lord,which I cannot do -- only He can.

I do not want to divorce him. I still love him. He is the father of my child. I don't want her to grow up without a daddy or for her to look at me and say you took my daddy away. What Bible verses will give me the direction in which I need to go? I'm looking to do the Lord's way, not mine?

Thank you.


Answer:

That your husband is not a follower of God is a given. There is no need to pretend any different. "Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God" (I Corinthians 6:9-10).

Hepatitis C is gained from an exchange of blood, usually needles. He didn't get this from drinking. Somewhere in his past he exposed himself to the blood of someone who had hepatitis C.

To say your husband had a hard life is misleading. People have hard lives because of circumstance beyond their control happened to them. Your husband's difficulties have always been of his own doing. He repeatedly sinned and broke laws. He suffered the consequences of his sins. The times he got away with his sins was not due to God. Your husband wasn't following God and had no intentions of repenting of his sins. "The LORD is far from the wicked, but He hears the prayer of the righteous" (Proverbs 15:29).

You are a patient woman to put up with such a man. He got more than he deserved in you. But I'm glad you are willing to care for him until the end, despite his many flaws.