Question:

My upstairs neighbor has been harassing me for about a year; deliberately stomping on the floor above my head. Sometimes every day, all day or every other day. This person literally follows me from room to room in my apartment. The acoustics in the apartment complex is horrible. If I open my cupboards, refrigerator, oven, or just the interior doors, or turn on the kitchen faucet, my neighbor hears it and immediately stomps across the floor toward my direction. If I go into my bedroom, living room or bathroom, the same thing happens. I've never met my upstairs neighbor and could literally walk past this person and not know it.

This person obviously has something against me, but what I don't know. He has never confronted me nor complained to my apartment manager about me. Which makes me wonder what's the problem here? I'm extremely tired, frustrated and my anger has reached its boiling point plenty of times, but I've somehow managed to keep my anger in check. I've thought of tactfully and respectfully approaching my neighbor, but I get the feeling that this person will refuse to listen to reason; especially since they've been provoking me for close to a year now. Things would no doubt escalate. I've thought about talking to the apartment manager and the cops, but then things would also escalate.

So, I've been ignoring this person while silently boiling over in anger, almost everyday. I've tried reading scripture from God's Word on how to deal with my persistent anger, and it has helped a lot. I've also been praying to God to help me deal with the situation as best as I can, as I have 5 months left on my lease and will be only too excited when my lease expires! In the interim, this person continues to make my life a living hell. I've read scriptures that said; "Anger rests in the bosoms of fools, don't be hasty in your spirit to be angry, he who is quick tempered acts foolishly, be angry and sin not, don't let the sun go down on your anger and the discretion of a man makes him slow to anger." These are some of the scriptures I've been reading and meditating on. The bottom line is that at all costs, I've been trying to avoid any verbal or physical confrontations with my neighbor; nobody wins in situations like the aforementioned. Five months and counting, what do I do?


Answer:

Both the reasons you ascribe to your neighbor for following you around and your projections as to what will happen if you say something are all based on conjectures. You don't know what is going on, why it is going on, or what someone's response will be if asked to stop. For all I know the neighbor upstairs has a big dog who is lonely. Understand that you are getting mad because you assume this is being done against you.

The truth is that while it is annoying you, it is causing you no actual harm. "Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord. Therefore "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so doing you will heap coals of fire on his head." Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good" (Romans 12:17-21).

Just continue with your plans for moving and when the manager asks the reason for leaving tell him that the neighbor above you was obnoxious. I would suggest that you get to know your neighbors wherever you live, then when you have a small issue it won't be such an effort pleasantly chat with the neighbor.