Question:

My wife and I have been friends with a lady at church and worked with her over the last four years. Over the years I have become this lady's confidant to which my wife says "back off." The lady and I have assured my wife that it's an innocent work ethic between us. In the last year our lady friend has become very serious about an older man who has many good qualities. He had just moved into our town bringing with him a very successful business and has hired our lady friend. On my first meeting with him I asked when his wife would be moving to town. He said he is divorced. I then asked what happened to cause the divorce. He responded that she said it's either me or the job and he responded to me "You see where I am" with a smile. Do I get our lady friend aside and tell her this face to face? My wife says stay out of it, but I'm the only one who knows as far as I know. Our lady friend had two unfaithful marriages before and I don't want her hurt again. What should I do?


Answer:

The next time this man's name comes up in a conversation, just casually mention that it is sad that he left his wife because he preferred work over his marriage. That should be enough to warn her.

And your wife is right, it isn't safe to be close to someone of the opposite sex. It is always best to avoid situations that may lead to problems or that even might look improper. Paul once planned to travel with money that the churches sent to aid the needy in Judea. He instructed them to select men from their congregations to go with him. Why? He was "providing honorable things, not only in the sight of the Lord, but also in the sight of men" (II Corinthians 8:21). You should always think about your reputation as well as avoiding temptation.

Thank you for the quick response. I will do as you suggested. Even though the lady and I had spent long hours together, Christ in one form or another was somehow making Himself present. I have been her shoulder along with confidant, so she was more like a daughter in need.