Question:

My husband and I dated for over a year before we had sex. We were each others first. Now it has been over three years, and we are still happily standing together. Around the time that we first had sex we both made a commitment to each other and God that we would only ever be with each other. God brought us together and together we brought each other closer to God, if that makes sense. Unfortunately we are not legally married by law or the church. The only reason we have not gotten married is my parents will not give me their blessing until I am through with college. My husband and I already see each other as husband and wife. Through much prayer we feel God has bonded us eternally. We praise God in all we do whether it is in the bedroom or not. Having kids would not be a burden at all actually we secretly hope for it every month. We do not live together as I am in one city attending college and he is attending another college. To this day I could not imagine loving anyone else the way I love my husband. But since we are not legally married does God see our sexual life sinful?


Answer:

I'm trying to figure out why you insist on living a lie. You call a man to whom you admit you haven't married your husband. You claim that you are forced into this situation because your parents won't bless your marriage, yet absolutely nothing hinders the two of you from going down to the courthouse and getting married. And you claim that God behind and approving of your breaking His laws. Each one of these are lies.

Why don't you admit the truth, you two are committing fornication because you want your parents to pay for your college. Once you get married, your source of funding will dry up. In other words, you are putting money above living morally according to God's laws. "No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth" (Matthew 6:24).

What does God think about this? "But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death." (Revelation 21:8). Quit the lies, the pretense and the immorality. Get married and prove that your claims of love are true.

Thank you. We talked about it and agreed that I will be marrying him this weekend. Wish us luck and thank you again.

I do wish you two the best.