Question:

I was one of those Christians that if you were to ask me if I died today would I go to heaven, I would say yes. But I was still in fornication, drinking, etc. And I would of went to hell thinking I was living right. I've let go all of that and asked God to forgive me for my sins, and wash me in the blood of Jesus to cleanse myself. I've also made the commitment of no sex until marriage, and it's been almost a year. I want to go get tested but the guilt of now knowing I was wrong is kind of scaring me and I'm afraid. I've asked God to cleanse my body and take away this fear because I know that's what the devil feeds off of. Does fear cancel out God's healing? Or is it because I do not have enough faith to realize God has already answered my prayers and knows my heart?

I have a Bible app in my phone and sends me random scriptures every day. Today I got this one. "For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death" (II Corinthians 7:10). Does it relate in anyway?


Answer:

It is good to hear that you've made steps in the right direction and are sticking to your commitment. I pray that you continue to examine yourself and make changes to draw closer to God. "Examine yourselves as to whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Do you not know yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you? -- unless indeed you are disqualified" (II Corinthians 13:5).

When Paul stated, "Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God" (I Corinthians 6:9-11), the phrase "but you were washed" refers to the fact that they had been baptized. "And now why are you waiting? Arise and be baptized, and wash away your sins, calling on the name of the Lord" (Acts 22:16). It is a shame that so many denominations ignore the command to be baptize, especially seeing as it is baptism that enters a person into the covenant with Christ and is what makes a believer a Christian. "In Him you were also circumcised with the circumcision made without hands, by putting off the body of the sins of the flesh, by the circumcision of Christ, buried with Him in baptism, in which you also were raised with Him through faith in the working of God, who raised Him from the dead. And you, being dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, He has made alive together with Him, having forgiven you all trespasses" (Colossians 2:11-13). Take a look at "What Must I Do to be Saved?" for more on this topic.

When you pray to God for help, you turn over to Him the things you cannot control, but it doesn't mean you expect to do nothing. When a person asks for healing and then doesn't do a thing, then what he is actually doing is putting God to the test without meaning to do so. If I cut myself, I put a band-aid on the wound or if it is serious, I'll go get stitches. I may ask God for a speedy recovery, but I still do the small things that are in my capability knowing that God will handle the rest. See: Does God Answer Every Prayer? and Is It a Sin to Take Medicine? -- to Consult a Doctor?

As Jesus said, "Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick" (Mark 2:17). Your past sins put you at risk of some fairly severe diseases. You left those ways, so you do what you can (see a doctor and if necessary take any medication prescribed), and leave the rest in God's hands. Nothing you or anyone else can do will stop what God wants done. However, if you don't really believe God will handle what you can't, then why ask? And from God's viewpoint, why grant an answer? "But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways" (James 1:6-8). Doing what you can is not an expression of doubt.

Repentance is a two-fold idea. It means you changed your mind about your sins and that you've changed your behavior. So repentance is what you did when you realized you were in sin. You didn't make excuses, you changed. "For godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation, not to be regretted; but the sorrow of the world produces death. For observe this very thing, that you sorrowed in a godly manner: What diligence it produced in you, what clearing of yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what vehement desire, what zeal, what vindication! In all things you proved yourselves to be clear in this matter" (II Corinthians 7:10-11).

Along with that you acknowledge you were wrong to God. "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (I John 1:9).