Question:

Does the man have to be the provider or breadwinner of the family in all circumstances? Is it acceptable biblically for a family to be comprise of a house husband and a career orientated wife? What advice would you give to someone who is about to be, or is in this situation? If it is not acceptable, would the solution then be to avoid marriage?


Answer:

You have posed a couple of really good questions that haunt men and women in society today. Biblically, the man needs to be a provider for his family. This was the role God gave him. It says in I Timothy 5:8, "But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever."

God set things up in a perfect, complete manner. He set Adam over Eve and gave each of them specific roles to play. Not only are men and women physically different, but their general make up is geared toward the roles they must fulfill. After Adam and Eve sinned, the consequence of their respective roles became harder. Woman bear children, but now in pain. Men labor, but now in hardship. Man cannot improve on the system God has created.

It would indeed be best to find a future wife who understood her unique role as wife and mother. Satan can deceive us with all kinds of messages that seem good on the surface, yet in the end only cause more turmoil. Role reversals that are in the world today is an example of this.

Women need to look at the righteous woman of Proverbs 31 and model their lives and expectations on that. Men should look to the encouragement in Ecclesiastes, "So I perceived that nothing is better than that a man should rejoice in his own works, for that is his heritage. For who can bring him to see what will happen after him?" (Ecclesiastes 3:22).Both sexes will feel truly fulfilled and do God's will if they would accept the roles God has given them.

There may be times when troubles in this world force men and women to adapt and take on roles that are not their forte. Such should be the exception and not the rule.

I hope you do well in finding a godly woman as your life's companion.

Carol Kusters