I was wondering if there is a tactful way to speak to someone about their homosexuality. I've made a dear friend in the last year and we have had numerous conversations about Christianity and faith. I've covered quite a lot of ground with her, definitely more than I have with any other person. She's begun reading Luke and Acts in preparation for us to study when I get back to college. She is both eager and very sincere in her interest. I don't want to ruin it with handling this issue the wrong way. She's very inquisitive about things, so I know the issue will inevitably come up, and I'd be very disappointed in myself if I spoiled her honest interest in the gospel with the wrong approach toward a sin so directly connected with what she feels is her nature, even if that may not be true.


"Now as He was going out on the road, one came running, knelt before Him, and asked Him, "Good Teacher, what shall I do that I may inherit eternal life?" So Jesus said to him, "Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God. You know the commandments: 'Do not commit adultery,' 'Do not murder,' 'Do not steal,' 'Do not bear false witness,' 'Do not defraud,' 'Honor your father and your mother.'" And he answered and said to Him, "Teacher, all these things I have kept from my youth." Then Jesus, looking at him, loved him, and said to him, "One thing you lack: Go your way, sell whatever you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, take up the cross, and follow Me." But he was sad at this word, and went away sorrowful, for he had great possessions" (Mark 10:17-22).

There is one gospel message, we try our hardest to present it in a way most likely to persuade a person to respond, but ultimately the response is up to the person. You cannot control whether a person is willing to give their lives over to Christ or not.

Homosexuality is a topic that you'll have to address sometime before she becomes a Christian. It would not be fair to a person to have unrealistic expectations about what being a Christian is about. And besides, to become a Christian one must repent of sins.

I would start with I Corinthians 6:11 to note that people in Corinth had been caught up in sins but had changed when they were saved. Then move to I Corinthians 6:9-10 to talk about what sins they have left behind. Note that many of these were sexual sins, yet they were all treated alike. The guy sleeping with his girlfriend had to give up his sins just like the homosexuals. And unlike the popular myth of today, it is possible for people guilty of sexual sins to change their behavior.

From there I would move to the origins of sexual sins, which includes homosexuality. That is discussed in Romans 1:18-32. That particular passage discusses the progress of the Greek society's decay. The steps are:

  1. A rejection of truth and God (Romans 1:18-21),
  2. The creation of idols based on the physical world (Romans 1:22-23),
  3. The removal of restrictions on sex, often blended with their idol worship (Romans 1:24-25),
  4. The move toward homosexual sex when free sex becomes common (Romans 1:26-27),
  5. The chaos in a society as barriers against sins collapse (Romans 1:28-32)

You can map that to the United States with

  • "God is dead" in the 1950's
  • Free love in the 1960's
  • Homosexuality 1980's to present
  • Increasing chaos, such as violence against children in schools.

By seeing the place homosexuality plays in the acceptance of sin, it is a bit easier to discuss than the prevailing arguments of "I can't help being who I am" and "I'm a victim of society."

Perhaps you will find that she doesn't like who she has become, but has accepted the lie that she can't help herself. Seeing that she does have a choice over her life, perhaps she'll gladly change.

Thank you Bro. Hamilton, I really appreciate this answer. I will be sure to let you know when I end up applying this. I really appreciate it.