In looking at your website, my wife and I note that you do not recommend the mom spanking teenage sons. Our youngest son is almost 12. Is it appropriate for my wife to continue spanking him until he is 13? Also, I note you recommend use of a switch. I prefer to spank both my sons (11 and 13) with my hand, except for very serious misdeeds. How do you feel about that?

It is not so much the age of the boy as his physical maturity. First, teenage boys are prone to having erections and this creates some awkwardness for mothers as well as for their sons. It is best to avoid the situation. Second, as boys become more muscular, most mothers find it difficult to effectively spank their sons.

The reason I suggest using a switch (or rod) is primarily because this is what is mentioned in the Scriptures (see Topical Scripture Index on Spanking for a list). Second, the fetching of a switch gives the child time to reflect on the upcoming punishment. It also gives the parent a few moments to calm down so that the punishment is more likely to be just and not a reflection of the parent's mood. Third, as boys get older, there is a tendency to strike harder to get a response. A switch stings and doesn't require a lot of effort or muscle to give an effective spanking. Finally, there is a psychological advantage of associating a spanking with the switch and not with the parent.

See also:

Questions and Answers regarding Spanking