I'm sorry if I'm always coming to you for answers. It's just that I can't still sleep at night. I think and think they're still coming home, but what I don't understand is why do bad things happen to good people that have nothing but good in them? I don't understand why God lets this happen. When a loved one passes away, I mean, what really happens? They say their spirit rises form the body and flows to heaven, but how do people know this? They just read it and the person who wrote it read it from somewhere. I just want to know that I will see my loved one again. I want to see and have some kind of contact, but I don't know how it can be done. All I hope for is that they're safe and in a better place and I'll see them again and be big and little brothers again. It's just that I don't want to believe they're gone. I want my loved one to come back to our family and be one big happy family again. I want to start going to church, but I don't know where and how to start. I never been to church before, but I want to and first I want to understand all the reason behind this before it's done. I'm left with a empty heart. Oh, I just want to understand everything.
Asking repeatedly is not going to change the answer. You asked and I answered the same basic question in "Can you have an out of body experience or be reincarnated?" and "Can we talk with those who have died?" You are returning to the same subject because the answer is not the one you want to hear.
"But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: ... For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts, always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth" (I Timothy 3:1, 6-7).
"For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables" (II Timothy 4:3-4).
You're ripe pickings for someone to take advantage of your depression and feed you what you want to hear, so you can line their pockets. At the rate you are going, you won't understand even a portion of everything because you have set your mind against the truth.
The truth is that someone you loved has died. He is beyond your reach. His life on earth is over. What he has done, he will give an account as all men must before the judgment seat of Christ. "For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive the things done in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad" (II Corinthians 5:10).
The truth is that you are still alive. You still have choices to make. You still have an opportunity to repent of your self-centered ways and submit to the will of God. ""Therefore I will judge you, O house of Israel, every one according to his ways," says the Lord GOD. "Repent, and turn from all your transgressions, so that iniquity will not be your ruin. Cast away from you all the transgressions which you have committed, and get yourselves a new heart and a new spirit. For why should you die, O house of Israel? "For I have no pleasure in the death of one who dies," says the Lord GOD. "Therefore turn and live!"" (Ezekiel 18:30-32).