What should I do with my husband who is living in adultery?




What does it means if you get a Bible scripture of Ezekiel 40?  How is it related to my problem?

I'm born-again and married, but my husband is staying with another woman. What should I do in this matter?  I found out last year that he was sleeping around with my born-again sister in Christ. I ask him to leave the house because it was a big scandal for me. We were serving God together and praying together and then this happen to me.

He left the house last February, 2005, and for the whole year we did not speak to each other until I phoned him to tell him that I want to speak to him about our marriage.  He believes what he is doing is right and he doesn't care about me.  Last month we went out for lunch together and he told me that he is still in love with me and I still love him very much. We were married for a second time, but he is again staying with another woman.

What should I do? I don't believe anything about God's things anymore because of my marriage. Please help me.

He said he changed; that God has spoken to him; that God has restore him, but he is staying in adultery, drinking, and lies. What kind of life am I living?

I'm living in the darkness. I want to divorce him. According the Bible I should do so.  Nothing happens to the ones who hurt the children of God because that lady is still with someone else and my husband is still going hurting me. I pray. but does God hears my cry anymore? I love God with all my heart but I'm starting to doubt my faith. Please reply.

"Truly God is good to Israel, To such as are pure in heart. But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled; My steps had nearly slipped. For I was envious of the boastful, When I saw the prosperity of the wicked. For there are no pangs in their death, But their strength is firm. They are not in trouble as other men, Nor are they plagued like other men. Therefore pride serves as their necklace; Violence covers them like a garment. Their eyes bulge with abundance; They have more than heart could wish. They scoff and speak wickedly concerning oppression; They speak loftily. They set their mouth against the heavens, And their tongue walks through the earth. Therefore his people return here, And waters of a full cup are drained by them. And they say, "How does God know? And is there knowledge in the Most High?" Behold, these are the ungodly, Who are always at ease; They increase in riches. Surely I have cleansed my heart in vain, And washed my hands in innocence. For all day long I have been plagued, And chastened every morning. If I had said, "I will speak thus," Behold, I would have been untrue to the generation of Your children. When I thought how to understand this, It was too painful for me- Until I went into the sanctuary of God; Then I understood their end. Surely You set them in slippery places; You cast them down to destruction. Oh, how they are brought to desolation, as in a moment! They are utterly consumed with terrors. As a dream when one awakes, So, Lord, when You awake, You shall despise their image. Thus my heart was grieved, And I was vexed in my mind. I was so foolish and ignorant; I was like a beast before You. Nevertheless I am continually with You; You hold me by my right hand. You will guide me with Your counsel, And afterward receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but You? And there is none upon earth that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart fail; But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. For indeed, those who are far from You shall perish; You have destroyed all those who desert You for harlotry. But it is good for me to draw near to God; I have put my trust in the Lord GOD, That I may declare all Your works" (Psalms 73:1-28).

You asked what does Ezekiel 40 mean in regards to your problem. The answer is that it means you are mishandling the word of God. "Be diligent to present yourself approved to God, a worker who does not need to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth" (II Timothy 2:15). The idea that you can simply flip your Bible open to a random page and find an answers to life's difficulties is not taught by God. God has given us words of wisdom, but wisdom comes by studying His teachings. You won't become wise by treating God's book like taro cards.

Jesus stated, "And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery" (Matthew 19:9). The fact that your husband is living with another woman is sexual immorality. Jesus gives you permission to divorce your husband in this case. I really don't know why you married him a second time when it seems apparent that he has not changed. I know he claims he has repented, but repentance means a change in life. Nothing changed. "You will know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes from thornbushes or figs from thistles? Even so, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Therefore by their fruits you will know them" (Matthew 7:16-20). Allow me to be blunt, your husband lied to you for his own profit.

You claim that you still love him, but the fact is that your husband does not love you. "Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" (I Corinthians 13:4-7). Your husband is behaving rudely, seeking his own gratification, has his mind in the sewer, and living a sinful life. This is not love!

If you still desire him, kick him out of your home and tell him that when he demonstrates that he want to be your faithful husband, you will have him back (I Corinthians 7:10-11). If he returns date him for a year or two to see if he really has changed before marrying him a third time. If you rather not wait for what is likely never to come, you can move on to someone else who will be faithful to you and to the Lord. The decision is yours to make.

See also:

Questions and Answers regarding Marriage
Questions and Answers regarding Divorce